Two o'clock in the morning and can't sleep.  So, I get up and fix a cup of decaf and a cinnamon roll.  Why not?  At this age, I can eat and drink whatever I want at whatever time of day or night it is.  Kinda nice being this age.

I had a short visit at an urgent care this evening.  My co-pay was $50.  You fork it over when you have to.  I was sitting and waiting to be called back and a "younger" couple came in and signed in.  His co-pay was $10.  I was happy for him, but thought to myself, why can't mine be $10.  We started talking about various things, insurance, doctors, the norm.  He continued to talk and indicated he had a "lot of rental property".  So I am quietly thinking, ok, you make good money, you must have good insurance and here I am on disability with Medicare and grateful to have that.  Something has to be wrong with the "system" when a disabled senior has a higher co-pay than someone who has more money.  Just a thought.

It is dark.

Woke up thinking I was actually going to enjoy a "full" day.  The room was dark and with just a glimpse of light through the curtains.  I usually don't get up until late in the day, so this was exciting.  Do my usual, sit up on the side of the bed and carry on.  Looked at my watch and it was NOON!!  Opened up the blinds and curtains to see a dark day.  Oh well, so much for thinking I was awake early enough for a full day.

I talked to a friend earlier on the phone and I remarked that it is dark when I wake up, dark throughout the day and dark when I go to bed.  I need some sunshine!  Guess I will just have to make my own.  With that being said, a good cup of coffee always brings on the sunshine!!

Dark and quiet here this Sunday.  Sophie and I are on the sofa warmed with our blanket and smiling at each other.  No, really, she is asleep under the blanket.  I will remain here except to get up from time-to-time to move my legs and body.  But, overall, this is another day of staying in.  I have stayed in for 3 days straight.  I am also trying to get well for Christmas.  Been fighting a UTI for 3 weeks.  I am on my third round of antibiotics, so getting well is very important.

Have a great day everyone!

Senior thoughts on Saturday

Quiet.  Christmas music in the background.  Overcast skies.  COLD.  Sophie and I are both covered up on the sofa with a wool blanket relaxing.  Finished my one cup of coffee.  Taken all of my medicine and starting on my daily 32 ounces of water.

When a senior is alone and quiet, many thoughts travel through the mind.  I have conversation quietly with myself.  I wonder if other seniors do this.  I think about life and what lies ahead.  I would love to get in the car and go to some antique stores and thrift stores.  My excuse is that it is too cold.  It truly is cold, but not a blizzard cold.  I think the real reason is that I am content right here in my comfort zone.  Not to mention that window shopping is not that much fun.  When there is no extra money in the budget for shopping, the thrill of the hunt is reduced to just "looking".  I know I can touch, see and feel the object.  That is fun, but nothing compared to knowing your journey led you to the treasure, but now you can't have it.  That is a part of life as a senior on a fixed income.  I know there have to be a lot of seniors out there experiencing the same lifestyle as myself.

For now, I will dream in my mind of my many treasure hunts and visit my favorite online store.  I use Ebay the same way many people read "books".  I learn so much visually and in the descriptions themselves.  Ebay has become my means of treasure hunting without leaving my home.  It has the same result though...no purchases, just window shopping.

To all the millions of seniors out there, hang on...spring is coming!

Alone Time

Being 65 and having a lot of alone time has its benefits.  Today is not a benefit day.  Why?  My attitude sucks!  Normally I am a jovial spirit and wake up with laughter in my heart.  I think I need some sunshine or something.  My routine is just that, routine!  lol  Wake up, sit on the side of the bed, check my phone, go to the bathroom, take my dog out, fix coffee, sit down on sofa with laptop on my lap and finish my coffee!  I go to bed looking forward to the next morning so that I can have my coffee and my laptop!  I am so NOT tech savy, so FB is about as far as I have ever gone.  Now, I think I have found a place where I can write down my thoughts.

I spend each day "alone" with my dog, Sophie.  Actually, she is my baby.  I rescued this precious Chihuahua about 6 years ago and she is such a joy.  Just knowing she is here with me keeps me from being "lonely".

I live in a small town in NC in what I call a "circle of apartments" just for us seniors!  I really like it.  If I choose to mingle and speak to humans, I can.  If I want to stay inside and just be me in my pj's all day, I can.  So, being alone is not a bad thing at all.  It is bad only when I allow myself to think of how my life "could have been".  That is so looking backwards.  Even at 65, I try to look forward and not backwards.  I tell my son, my only child, life is better when we handle every day without stress or anger.  If something causes me stress, I do my best to eliminate it or "them".  Yes, people too.  Negative people have no place in my life!!  My ex-mother-in-law stressed me so much, I divorced her son and that eliminated her!  lol

This blogging thing is definitely new to me.  Looks like I might not have as much room as I need to say all that is on my mind today.  So, bye for now.